Taking the High Road . . . Again

One of my supervisors, whom I consider a great mentor, told me the other month, “while taking the high road is often lonely, it’s always the right decision”. 

For the most part, I agree with her.  I just label it “picking my own battles”.  This theory started almost a decade ago when I started dealing with the ex during my pregnancy.  I choose not to fight every single issue, instead I focus on what’s really important to my values and objectives.  This philosophy does not always work well with the ex, but I continue to apply it to friend, family, work, and other life situations and have had success.

The situation with the passive aggressive friend (last week’s post) has now escalated but not because of her.  Instead, a mutual friend who loves drama and actively seeks it out has decided to get herself involved.  I was in tears the other day because of this.  I am doing better now, a few days later, but I hate this feeling of isolation.  Instead of confronting any of the parties involved, I have stepped back.  I smile and chat as I usually do at school, but that’s it.  I guess it’s my way of protecting myself.  I no longer call or text either of them.

This probably isn’t the best way to handle it.  My self-imposed isolation has bitten me in the ass because I could really use friends now.

In a random moment of strangeness (yes this sounds weird even to me), earlier today I got an email on my hotmail account.  It was from the ex’s girlfriend (or fiancée according to all the trial documents). 

There was no subject line, the email was brief, only a few sentences.  The gist of the entire email was that I needed to stop spreading lies about her and her family or she would file a restraining order.

WTF?!

I have never contacted this woman.  The only way she could have gotten my hotmail account address was from the ex or by reading the motion and attachments (because most of the attachments were emails between me and the ex).

My initial reaction was to fire back a response that would have started along the lines of, “you’re apparently under the misapprehension that I give a flying f*ck about you . . . ” and gone downhill from there.

Of course I didn’t respond at all.  After a few deep breaths I came to the conclusion that no matter how I responded it would not make a difference at all.  Logic simply will not work.  All I can do is document this and hope to God she does not start a campaign of harassment involving my email and my phone number (if she knows my email, she surely knows my cell number).

I do appreciate the irony that she’s the one harassing me in this whole restraining order threat.

The other question that immediately came to mind was, “what the hell brought this email on?!”

After over-analyzing all afternoon, my only conclusion was that a judgment is issued.  My ex will receive the judgment at least a day before me because of the geographical distance and standard mail so maybe he got something yesterday?

So now I can’t sleep, I can’t focus, I can’t do anything but wonder . . . will a judgment arrive tomorrow?!  And if so what will it say? 

The mail at my house arrives late (3:30 -4:00 p.m.) so I get to agonize for another sixteen hours.

My mom wonders if maybe the girlfriend finally saw the motion and other court docs and flipped out.

It’s a strong possibility but here’s where my over analytical side comes in.  In the email, several of her sentences were almost identical to what my ex had in his responsive pleadings just over two weeks ago.  I have every reason to believe that both her and the ex read my motion and saw the attachments two months ago.

I really think a judgment was issued.  I’ll know tomorrow via the mail, but if nothing is there, I have no clue what brought this email on  . . .

Waiting sucks . . . do I start prepping a notice of filing, a notice of appeal, or a request for trial court review . . .  truth is, I have worked on all three over the last couple of weeks.

Or am I just freaking out over what may be pent up anger from the ex’s gf?